Brain Food #691
What are you inviting in?
Thoughts of the day
Though it is a generally accepted fact, and one of the tragedies of life, that we cannot control much of our reality beyond what is directly within our limited powers, there is a component of human psychology that implies that our behaviours and mannerisms can directly influence those of another.
Mirroring is a behaviour in which one person imitates the gestures, speech pattern, or attitude of another. When you mirror someone else, you subconsciously establish a bond of trust with them. Negotiation experts encourage mirroring in difficult conversations, to get someone on your side. Mirroring can also happen subconsciously, for example, when a person develops a form of attraction towards another, they start reflecting their movements. Our body speaks its own language.
Beyond mirroring being a tool to generate empathy and a bond with someone, it might be worth considering in the opposite manner: what are you inviting in from others with your existing behaviours? If you show indifference, they will be indifferent. If you are angry, they will be angry. It is easier to think we are always the victims of our circumstances, but as I previously wrote, we are the victims of our expectations. What has not happened yet can still change. Thus mirroring becomes an act of creation, in which we can permit the circumstances of a situation to tilt towards the way we want them to be, be it a more favourable result, or a connection with a stranger.
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